Ipecac  - i keep reading it and i know it makes you throw up, but where do you get it, how much, and side effects?

So let me give you a little background story:
This Spring I went from 138lbs to 110.
I  felt thin, momentarily.
Then I moved from home, to living in a basement,
I started binging like everyday for 3 weeks,
I almost hit 120 when I snapped out of it,
I amback down to one ten, only by restricting.
I work In an office and alhough it doesnt sound like I burn a lot of calories,
I am a receptionist and basically the go to girl for everything,
basically I run around in heels all day.
I need some calories, but Its all health food,
Oh yeah and the people who I live with make me dinner every night
Along with a calcium and iron defficency.

Here's My Plan as of Sept 11th 2007 
Everything has lots of water

Wake-up, washroom, weigh in, shower, get ready

Breakfast :  NV weight loss Pill.  One a Day Weight Control Multivitamin. Calcium/Magnesium Pill. Birth Control.  Slim Fast Vanilla = 120 Cals

Work: Coffee.Coffee.Coffee

Lunch: what ever I have for the day, must be under 300 cals total, usually have oatmeal (keeps you full) 180 cals & fruits/vegis for the rest = 300 cals

Work : Take afternoon pills: NV weight loss pill. One a Day Women's multivitamin. Calcium/Magnesium Pill.  Iron Pill.  Diet Coke & Tea

Dinner: Don't know what it is, but only have very small serving, never seconds. Usually very healthy, always make plate look full with Veg = 500 cals Max

So thats a Grand total of 920 cals
I use 1800 ish calories just living plus whatever activities,
So thats a grand total of -880 cals a day
Which means Ill be at my STGW(105) By October 1st and You never know If the weight loss pills work, maybe sooner




UPDATED STATS
Height 5'8
CW 110lbs - BMI - 16.7
HW 138 - BMI 21
LW 108 - BMI 16.4
SGW 105 - BMI 16
GW 100 - BMI 15.2

Ok so I havn't posted to my Journal in a while, usually just the pro-ana community, so I guess its due for an update:

First Off My Stats:
Age: 18
Height 5'8
CW 110lbs (BMI 16.7)
HW 138 (BMI 21)
LW 110 (BMI 16.7)
STGW 105 (BMI 16)
LTGW 100 (BMI 15.2)

I have been stuck at 110 for about 3 weeks now, no matter what I do I won't lose anymore, so here's my theory:
Just like in 2,4,6,8 you trick your motaolism by being high and dropping down the next day, so I ate today, a large dinner, tomorrow nothing.

I have an office job and live with relatives.  I am on my own basically all the time except dinner, which they always have ready for me.
At least I throw out my lunch I take, so no cals (or under 100) and I live on Diet Coke and Coffee.
I have ana, not mia, I've thought about it, and have tried before, and want to right now, but I can't.
Pretty sure I'm headed that way anyways.
I just moved cities and I'm really lonely, no friends here, except some guys on the weekend.
Pretty sure I'm depressed.
That leads me to my next problem: going out/binge drinking,
And its not just the weekend the occasionall weekday too, 
Pretty sure Im an alcoholic now too.
I'v dated and had one boyfriend, but not a serious one,
I really want one to tell me I'm beautiful and to hold me,
Pretty sure I'm pathetic now....Oh yeah and I really need to get laid, its killing me (sry if tmi)

The thing I hate the most is how I know I've never been this thin in my life;
Yet everytime I look in the mirror I see chunks of fat,
I know its not really there, but its all I can see.
I'm so fucked up
I just want to be thin.

Well I guess thats all thats up in my life right now....any questions feel free to ask,
LOVE MK

BTW->My favourite song right now is Skin & Bones - Mariana's Trench, 
Its a great ana/mia song.....here are the lyrics, hope they help someone (Ive Bolded my favourite parts)

I lock the door
Turn on the water
Bury that sound
So no one hears anything anymore
Mirrors lie to me, tell me you can see
Maybe you won't be able to recognize me now
I know you can feel, all the things you steal
And you're taking, you're takin it

Feeling so easy
Make me skin and bones
I'm always on my knees for you
You break like it's even
When you're faking it
Thin, Where have you been?

Well sometimes it burns
Baby I'll wash it out
It all look so big
Nevermind, I don't feel anything

It only hurt a bit
I still feel like shit
And I think you won't be able to recognize me now
It's easier to quit
Harder to admit and
You're pushin me, you're fucking pushin me!

Feeling so easy
Make me skin and bones
I'm always on my knees for you
You break like it's even
When you're faking it
Thin, Where have you been?

Cause you always win
You always win

Laughin' like it works
Bleeding like it dont hurt
Knock you off your feet
Even if you need me
Tear you apart, hey now i need you

Feeling too easy make me skin and bones
Im always on my knees for you
Break like its even
When your fakin

Current Location: My Bedroom
Current Mood: indescribable
Current Music: Mariana's Trench

OK So I'm new here, and it felt like an eternity to get accepted,

so I'llstart with my stats 5'8

CW 118
HW 138
LW 113
SGW 110
LGW 105

So let me truely show how fucked up I am,  I was watching the borrowers (the movie) and watching all  these mini people the size of well mice,  and i wondered "how many calories do they eat in a day?"

seriously,
MK

Current Mood: cold

OK So I'm new here, and it felt like an eternity to get accepted,

so I'llstart with my stats 5'8

CW 117
HW 138
LW 113
SGW 110
LGW 105

So let me truely show how fucked up I am,  I was watching the borrowers (the movie) and watching all  these mini people the size of well mice,  and i wondered "how many calories do they eat in a day?"

seriously,
MK

Current Location: Bed
Current Mood: tired

ive been waiting days to join the proana pg,  seriously i cant handle this i just need support

Current Mood: depressed

Hi Im MK,
I wont lie this whole LJ thing is so confusing,
MK - is actually my name
I have brown hair (kinda auburny with gold highlights)  and brown eyes,
My eyes are my favourite thing about me,  when I am upset or angry they go black, when i am happy they are golden, and when i feel souless they are light and clearish.  but they can give all my secrets away
Lately i have been going through a lot, like you know the whole "emo" phase everyone went through at like 14, well i think its hit me, which is rediculous cause im almost 18.  I try not to show it but the truth is i dont care about much anymore and im sad a lot.  but know one knows, and have to cover a lot in my life because i am a pageant girl and am currently the Miss ________  in my city.  i live in canada!  so i have to be perfect all the time, and eventhough they are accepting of all types of girls and theres no bathing suit so it doesnt matter your size, i want to be perfect and because i see all the queens from the other cities across my province is it wrong to want to be the prettiest and thinest.  The hardest thing is i work with food, and i cook at home oh and lets not forget i travell every weekend so hello fast food catered food and restaurants,  aka hello calories!!!!!!  i just wish all my old clothes would fit, well they fit but they are tight,  i just lost some weight though but ive plateaued and well hate myself right now, and  i cant stop binging every day at 11 o clock i break down and all that is around for my break is sweets, chips, candy,chocolate, and pop, oh and ice cream.  summer is almost here and i hate how i look, i just want to be thin as my friends.

height 5'7/5'8
CW 120
HW 138
LW 113
GW 110


feel free to msg me if you want to talk, or want to know more about me
lots of love & stay strong
MK!

Current Location: BED
Current Mood: disappointed
Current Music: Grace Kelly - MIKA

ugg I had noodles and a lg slice of pizza today,  gross

not to mention i had the worst afternoon ever, and i have to work tonight, in a food place,

give me strength

Current Mood: crushed